Q: Which bate clubs have you been to?

A: I’ve visited Seattle (Rain City Jacks), New York (NY Jacks), Detroit (Motor City Jacks), Denver, Portland (Stumptown Jacks), Los Angeles (Lax Jaxx), DC (Capitol Jacks), and London (Bator Bro).

Q: How did you first discover the world of organized bate events?

A: “I stumbled upon it through a Vice article about Rainy City Jacks around 2019 or 2020. Before that, I used to organize small groups myself, hosting 10-11 people at my apartment. My ex and I even threw larger parties with up to 35 people in hotel rooms. We even did a circle jerk with everyone’s hands on two different cocks. It was incredibly hot! But reading about Rainy City Jacks opened my eyes to more organized events.”

Q: What are your top three bate clubs, and why do they stand out?

A: “The top three when it comes to diversity are Seattle’s Rainy City Jacks, New York City Jacks, and [Bator Bro in] London. Seattle was the first time I’d been in a room with such a variety of shapes and sizes. It was fascinating and even more of a turn-on. New York and London also impressed me with their diverse scenes. As a person of color, seeing representation in a club matters. It helps me let my guard down and feel more comfortable in my skin.”

Q: What else makes a good bate club?

A: “Space design is crucial. I’ve noticed that when the space is open, without many separate rooms or cubby holes, groups interact more. However, once you reach a certain number of people, the layout becomes less important as interaction naturally increases due to the crowd size.

Location is a double-edged sword. Venues in known LGBT areas make people feel more comfortable, but you miss out on a large group of guys who consider themselves straight. These men might avoid gay establishments to maintain discretion or because they’re in relationships. The choice of location – whether it’s a house, hotel, or dedicated venue – makes a huge difference in who attends and the overall vibe.”

Q: You mentioned diversity. I’ve also noticed it’s more than just race and body types. What are your thoughts?

A: “This is a fascinating aspect of bate clubs. They create a unique cross-section of subcultures within the gay community. You have club kids, fetish enthusiasts, nerds, and wellness types all in the same space. These are groups that would rarely, if ever, interact in other venues. It’s a melting pot of diverse interests and backgrounds.”

Q: What is the African American bate scene like, compared to the others?

A: The African American community’s experience with bate clubs in the United States is often more underground compared to mainstream events. These scenes are typically not held in studio spaces, which can make them feel different from other organized events. These events often take place in private homes, specified spaces, or even parks. For someone new to the scene, it can be unnerving because you’re often showing up at an unfamiliar location rather than a dedicated venue. One example is a group called “Beefy Bears” that existed before the more organized Detroit event got started. This group was predominantly African American and catered to what they called “beefy” guys – men with larger, muscular builds.

Q: What’s the vibe like?

A: These events often attract men who identify as “DL” or “down low.” This can include men who have wives or children, or who aren’t out in the community. There’s often an element of discretion due to community stigma. There are various dynamics at play, including cultural factors and the need for discretion. It’s understandable why some people might want their own space where they feel more comfortable. While I understand the need for separate spaces, I believe that diversity in a large, organized group is ultimately healthier and makes for a better experience overall.

Q: How do you think bate clubs fit into the way we socialize today? 

A: “The pandemic has significantly impacted socialization in our community. We’ve become more reliant on phones and apps to meet people. The bar scene has changed – people don’t chat up strangers like they used to. Bate clubs offer a unique solution. They provide a space where people can gather, talk, and build community in a way that’s become rare in other settings. It’s filling a social void that the pandemic has left behind.”

Q: Do you have a memorable bate story to share?

A: “I had an incredible one-on-one experience with a guy I met. The level of intimacy and comfort was unparalleled. I was able to completely let go and be in the moment. The orgasm was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before – it was intense, almost out-of-body, with uncontrollable shaking. I’d never cum like that before.

He was edging me, which I now understand is the term for it. He got me to that point with my hands behind my back. It was a completely new experience for me, and I think it really accelerated my journey in this world. It’s fascinating how different each experience can be. That first intense session really opened my eyes to the possibilities.”

Q: How’s your bate journey going? Any new revelations? 

A: “I’ve found that I actually enjoy edging other guys more, especially in recent weeks. Interestingly, many of these have been with men who identify as straight. They’ll come over, assert their straightness, but then let me stroke them. It’s incredible to witness someone be submissive and let their imagination take over. It’s a fascinating and amazing experience. When I finish with these guys, their reactions are priceless. They’re often in awe, describing it as an out-of-body, out-of-mind experience. Many express surprise, saying things like, “Wow, I’ve never let a guy touch me like that before.”